BodyZen

I am back on deck after spending more time being a Mom and a Coach and less time blogging so thanks for your patience :)

I wanted to share an exchange I had recently which is typical of many I have had over the last three years.  I was talking to a friend who is a very intelligent, compassionate and professional woman.  She was sharing with me that one of her friend's has just started on a diet initiated by a physician that involves 'mostly lentils and green veggies' (her words) and not much else.  The woman undertaking this diet is keen to lose weight and I can only imagine that when being guided by a physican we would assume we are being given sound advice.  I asked if this woman is having trouble psychologically with this kind of denial and the answer was a resounding 'yes'.  'She won't even feed her kids the same diet, so why would she be prepared to have it?' my friend wondered.  

Now let me be clear - this is NOT an exercise in criticising this woman for her diet choice.  This is more a message about the absolute pervasiveness of the belief that we must DENY ourselves to extreme levels in order to lose weight.  Really where is the common sense in all this?  What could be more punishing??  When I say to you that it has been proven that the denial approach (which = diet) sets up a psychology of absolutely positively, wanting, needing and ultimately obsessing about the food/s you are witholding I am sure you would agree from your own personal experience that this is true.  You are a greater person than I am if you can decide that you will no longer eat chocolate and then not resort to gorging on a family block (or dare I say cooking chocolate) at some point!  Time is the only variable here - eventually we will all binge on chocolate.  

BUT if we decide to take the opposite approach and make NO food off limits, but instead gradually change our eating habits to include more healthy options and less junk then we will find that elusive long term successful weight loss.  And guess what?  We will also allow ourselves to indulge on our favourite treats that may be junky, but we will savour and enjoy them and rarely binge on them.

So Ladies I implore you if you haven't already please stand up and say a FAT 'NO' to any more diets, denial or extreme eating regimes.  Dump them all in the bin for good.  Replace all this punishing behaviour with gentle, loving kindness towards yourself and how you treat your body.  Sounds too good to be true?  Many women just like you have proven time and time again that it is not.   This can be your reality.  You can have your cake, and eat it too.  

Mireille Guiliano in her book ‘French Women Don’t Get Fat’ tells us that French women have a healthy relationship with their body.  They also tend not to snack, or binge, and they steer clear of processed foods.  

According to Guiliano, there are a number of things that French women do differently to a lot of American, Canadians and Australians including giving themselves permission to eat cake and chocolate.  Of course the key here is GIVING THEMSELVES PERMISSION rather than classifying them as a forbidden food.  Not having a list of forbidden foods can put an end to bingeing, as we find at BodyZen when women take up our Eating Program, which is about 100% permission.  Paradoxically, when you allow yourself to eat any food, you will break the diet shackles and you will normalize your weight over time.

BodyZen is all about losing weight without dieting and finding peace with your body.  How do we help women do both of these things? We have 3 principles which are the framework of our programs.  I have recently blogged on the first principle which is 'practice mindfulness' particularly with how you eat.  The second principle is 'make your body your temple'.  When clients commence the BodyZen process they typically have been yo-yo dieters, or yo-yo exercisers for years.  They may also have struggled with poor body image and a lack of acceptance and appreciation for their body.  In this mindset, it is virtually impossible to lose weight successfully, and to ever feel comfortable in your skin.  The key to shifting the shape, size and condition of your body permanently AND to feeling genuine appreciation for your physical being is to adopt a new positive mindset.  The ideal mindset is one where you accept,  and respect your body in this moment and feel a desire to take care of it because it is precious.  When you make your body your temple, you automatically make healthier choices for you.  You start to listen to what your body needs and wants, and you feed it more nourishing food, and you move it in a way that strengthens and supports your physical condition.  You also choose to sleep enough, and to relax regularly.  Please notice that I say this happens 'automatically'  which is the exact opposite of the 'forced' approach that dieting and typical weight loss programs require.  This is one of the reasons why 95% of diets fail.  

So it is easy to understand the value of making your body your temple, but how do you translate this into your daily life?  The answer is that there are many ways to shift your mindset and it can take some time.  The starting point is always making the decision that you are ready to relate to your body and yourself more gently and positively.  Declaring your decision can be simply writing it down, stating it out loud or saying it within.  The declaration is important though to start shifting the energy of your thoughts and feelings in relation to yourself.  One declaration that can be very powerful is 'my body is my temple'.   If you make this declaration before you make food, exercise, rest or relaxation choices it will help you make a better, more conscious choice for yourself.  If you feel ready to test this out start today.  Imagine that your body IS your temple and you will intuitively start to make better choices for you.   

And remember we would love to hear your experiences and questions on our facebook page or our website forum.  Enjoy taking care of yourself!